Solid Defiance
by Lady Arrow21
Summary: I would rather be with you than spend my eternity without you." Based on a Movie, you guess, and author's experience. AU/OOC
1. Epilogue

I can only see a bright light shinning down on me. It hurts my eyes not to say the least. I could see a blurred color of blue, or was it the color of the sky, between those lights. I do not have the ability to decipher where I was or the things that I can see. All that I am seeing is this light; all that I can hear is nothing, all I can feel is my irregular breathing.

* * *

"Update, BP is 80/50. It is suddenly decreasing."

"OK, I will not let you go anywhere but here on my table."

"Cautery please."

"Tie please, scissors."

"Please ready Epinephrine, the usual dosage."

"Doc, HR is 180, RR 40, BP 40/palpable."

"No, no, no. PNSS 1L give it now."

* * *

Had I become devoid of anything that belongs to me? Wait, what do I own on the first place that I have known myself exists? Do I even exist? I tried to reach for the light, but I cannot. The next thing that I noticed was the hand that was reaching for the light. But somehow, as if I could feel it moves.

"It is yours."

"..."

"Yes, it is yours."

"...it is mine?" I tried to talk back to the voice, but I can't hear anything.

"It is. You do not have to worry about anything. Rest assured the next instant you open your eyes you will regain your full senses. Take another sleep, and rest your weary soul."

I had heard the light talking. As if I was hypnotized the body that contains my soul has drifted yet again to another long sleep.

* * *

I can only watch this commotion in front of me. I do not have the slightest idea what is going on. From what I can draw conclusion on this scene is that they are trying to revive someone that is fated for me to collect.

She tugs my long sleeve. I looked upon a dreary soul on my left side. She was not looking to me but instead to the body that once was hers.

"Tell me," she started "I am not to go back on my earthly body since I saw you, right?"

"Yes."

"Well, I don't know anywhere else to go. Please guide me." Sorrowful eyes have met nothing but another empty well.

"There's nothing to guide us but the only light you see on our path."

It is the start of her long awaited journey towards what human calls as after-life. I am only her guidance.

As we took off, my attention was caught by a figure that was familiar through a blank page of memory. But I have to disregard that thought, not that it was a rule amongst the like of us, everything that I may have known in my past life was erased. I will not and can not recover anything.


	2. Thanatophopia

"OK, I guess there's nothing else we can do here. Start postmortem care with the patient." She heavily sighed with their failed attempt of reviving the patient.

"Yes doc."

"Hey, if you're finished with the last stitch come at the rooftop I will be waiting for you." She called out to her assistant.

"Yes, I will be there. Don't wait for me if I take longer than expected." She smiled at the surgeon though it was hidden through her mask.

"Yeah, I won't. I know you'll get finished with it sooner." The surgeon replied back while tossing the used sterile gown to one of the surprised circulating nurses.

"You know you should not be doing that."

"Whatever." She shrugged at her statement exiting the operating room.

"Doc! Wait up! What about the patient's chart you have to…!" One of the scrub nurses rushed towards the surgeon who was now gone in everyone's sight.

"Ahh, seriously that's not like her. She doesn't leave the room without finishing everything." Another scrub nurse complains at the random turn of events.

"_She never really losses that smile. For some reason I don't want to believe it at all. I don't want to believe that everything's fine with her." _She thought to herself.

* * *

"Why did you want to talk to me, Mam Yohko?" A woman donned in a purple scrub suit called out to the surgeon with a grin plastered on her face.

"Hmmm, what did I told you to call me even when there's a lot of staff around?" She asked her assistant without even looking back at her.

"Let's see." She crossed her arms and one index finger landed on her right cheek. "I guess you told me to call you "Yohko". Oh yes, you said that." She teased the surgeon and clapped her hands.

"He he he. Right! You haven't changed at all." She giggled while rubbing her right temple.

"Ara, is there anything for me to change Yoh-ko-sen-sei?"

"No, none at all." She finishes the argument, knowing too well she won't win against this woman. "You didn't take your time there, did you?"

"No, there's no need to be."

"_It's only because you don't want to stay there any longer. You don't want anyone to see you in such a state." _She said it more to herself than to the woman beside her.

Silence passed them as if they knew what each other of them is thinking.

"Yohko, that's too much unexpected of you." The woman clad in purple scrub suit started.

"Too much unexpected, like what?" She asked back though she knew what her assistant meant.

Her assistant sighed before replying to her. "To what had happened earlier. It is not to be expected of you in any way. The patient should have survived. She should have survived"

"You want cigarette?" Yohko offered her.

"No, thank you. You know very well I am not smoking and hated second hand smoke. I don't even know where you get that. It had been years since I saw you smoke." She stated calmly. "Years ago I've seen you like this."

Yohko puff a smoke then throws the cigarette butt on the floor and stepped on it. She positioned herself at the back of her assistant. She hugged the woman with her left arm at her neck; her right hand imitated a pistol and pressed her index finger at the middle right of her torso.

"You know, shit happens." She pressed her left index finger harder on her torso, locating her vital organs. "Bang!" She whispered on her ear.

Her assistant jolted freeing herself from the surgeon's hug.

"Oohh!" Her lips formed a perfect O. "He he he, you know what? That! That was unexpected of you!" Giggling, she pointed her right index finger at her, still on her gunner's mode. "Bang, bang!" She feined as if firing a real hand gun.

"Heh, you have your fun there." A faint blush appeared on both of her cheeks. "I am just concerned about you on what had happened! This is the first time that a patient died on you, Yohko!" She blurted out her concern towards her senior.

"Like I said, shit happens." She shrugged. "We got into this profession not only because we wanted to save life. We got into this because we also needed to accept that we can't if the situation gets worse. No, I guess we should understand the fact that things happen."

"No, I know we can save the patient's life if only we had been more aggressive than we should have!" She argued back to the older woman.

"Do you think I am not? You have been my apprentice for two years now; you should know my skills far better than anyone else in my table. Or you doubt about it, right?" She asked the woman straight on her face.

"I don't… have any doubts in your skills Yohko." She answered her senior looking away from her.

"Then we don't have anything to discuss about." She lit up another cigarette and puffs a smoke.

A ringtone of Single Ladies disturbed them from their reverie.

"Oh, excuse me. Is it ok?" Yohko ask her assistant.

"Yes, go on."

"Hello? Yohko Sagisawa speaking… Yes, tell my secretary to put it in my desk… Oh you did? Thank you… Sorry, I'll be down in my office in a sec… Alright then. Bye." Yohko ended her call shaking her head in amusement.

"Midori-chan?"

"Yes, I'm going now. How about you?"

"I'll be staying here for a bit. I'll see you later."

"Hmm. Alright." Yohko ended the conversation that would be unlikely be going anywhere and walked towards the door.

"Hey." She turned on her heel before opening the knob. "You know I am more concerned about you more than myself. I know the reason why you came up to me to be my apprentice. My zero mortality status. It is not actually zero when I first met you." She opens the door without waiting for her assistant to reply back.

"I know that Yohko, I know." She whispered more to herself.

She felt a wind that was neither cold nor warm brushed her cheeks. As if on cue she moves her hands up to her cheeks. Perplexed, she was amused to find teardrops flowing down without restraint on her cheeks.

"Oh… What… th-?" She sobbed through tears flowing abundantly in her cheeks.

She isn't the type of person who would cry with no reason especially after an argument. She's a strong willed-woman without anything that she knows that will actually make her cry like this. But something about her argument with her senior surgeon made her unconscious mind remember of the past. Pouring everything that she could, she cried all her heart out, without the restraint she mustered herself for so long.

* * *

"Suvi."

A being clad in black gown turned her head towards the source of voice.

"Seth. You're here." she replied back.

"I see you're accompanying a human here." He smiled his warmest to her.

"Tell me."

"Hmm?"

"Can a human feel us?"

"Let's see. Maybe, maybe yes. That I cannot answer entirely as I didn't dare touch a human before." He honestly answered her.

"Oh." She returned her gaze to the woman who was clad in purple scrub suit in front of her.

"Suvi, we have to go now."

She nods in agreement with him.

* * *

She felt drained after but it didn't make her relieved at all. She stayed to where she was for another moment, easing her heart and mind.

"I couldn't face anyone like this." She told herself.

The purple clad woman still in her thoughts didn't notice that someone has come into the rooftop.

"Ah there you are! We've been looking for you everywhere. I'm glad I found you Shizuru!"

TBC.

* * *

Thanatophobia - extreme and irrational fear of personal death, situations involving death.

Postmortem care - providing physical care of the body of an expired patient and support for the family viewing the body.

A/N: Single Ladies was playing in the background when I was writting that line with Yohko. =3


End file.
